Why I Own Bible Highlighters

I’m not religious. I don’t own a Bible. I could borrow my daughter’s in a pinch, but I personally am Bible-less.

What I do own is a set of Bible highlighters.

It started when I wanted to edit an essay. I needed highlighters to mark various issues, such as missing transitions.

I swear I had a set of highlighters, but fairies stole them. Or gnomes. It could have been gnomes.

So I got on Amazon to buy highlighters. I like gel highlighters because they don’t bleed. I’m starting graduate school in a few weeks and I expect to be doing a lot of highlighting.

It turns out that every cheap gel highlighter advertises itself as a Bible highlighter.

People who highlight their Bible, which apparently is a thing, obviously don’t want the highlights to bleed through the page.

I looked at a lot of highlighters because buying Bible highlighters felt a little weird for someone who doesn’t own a Bible.

I also thought it was weird that they weren’t marketed at all to students. I’m old. Do students not highlight anymore?

Then I started thinking about my reaction. Highlighter makers are positioning their products to be seen and purchased by their target market, which is apparently Christians who mark up their Bible, and not fifty-eight-year-old graduate students.

Finally, I realized I was tired, hungry, and dramatically overthinking a six-dollar purchase.

It’s fine that I bought Bible highlighters.

There are no highlighter cops.